It's Raining, It's Pouring

What a dreary day! Yesterday it was 69 degrees here. Today it feels like 34 with the wind chill. Yes, I said wind chill. What's the date? April 12. We should NOT have to be dealing with wind chill in April. I would much rather be dealing with humidity, and I don't even like humidity. After an experience of being lost and thirsty to the point of real concern once while we were backpacking, my sister and I have become good at reminding ourselves that it's all in perspective. We were on our hands and knees drinking water out of a tiny stream only about one half inch deep. We stopped to pray for direction and over the next hill we again found the trail. See.....it was all in perspective. We felt hopelessly lost and yet were so near wheere we needed to be. My dad is in the hospital. It looks like he's going to be alright, but it's been a pretty crappy week, literally. My friend's mom that I mentioned several days ago has learned that she has stage 4 cancer in at least 3 areas of her body. It's all in perspective. Yes, today is a lazy, gloomy day, but the sun will shine again. Until then, I have decided to take the day to take it easy, look at some pictures of rain that's worse than it is here, and days in the last year that have been much nicer than today.

These are push-carts that can be rented in Monrovia. Very few people own vehicles, so when they need to get a large item from A to B, they use one of these. It gets tipped upright, much like a wheel-barrow, the item is strapped to the bars, and off you go, pushing your cart through town.
Our roads have suffered through this long winter. It's nothing compared to what it could be. Here are a couple pictures to keep it all in perspective as far as what bad roads really look like.

This is Jamaica Road. It's one of the main roads in Monrovia. It would be comparable to Anthony or Lima Rd. in Fort Wayne. In one of my earlier blogs I wrote about walking to church on Jamaica Road. This is taken on the way to church.
Just to keep things in perspective, now we're going to reminisce about prettier days. The first full day I went was in Liberia we went to Cece Beach. These are some examples fo different days there. Yes, the life of a missionary is a lot of hard work and difficult experience, but let me be the first to day it's not all bad.

A reminder that there's still a lot of work to be done cleaning up after the war.

If you were lucky enough to be the first ones at the beach, this whole area was swept smooth with palm fronds.
We had some of the most adorable children living on the ship with their families. It was nice having all age ranges represented. The youngest was months old and the oldest was 72. You're never too young or old to serve.
This is Libby. Her name is Liberty, and she was an orphan in Liberia. Her adoptive parents are from the UK. She was definitely my favorite person on the AFM. The first time I met her, she was very annoyed to be forced to be friendly to yet another new person. After I had asked her name a couple times and her mum gave her no choice. She put her hands on her hips, rolled her eyes, and said, "I'm Wibby!" She prompty stomped off. It took another 2 weeks to get her to respond to me again. I LOVED her!

Now, we're going to Miami. I had a free airline ticket to use, so my sister and I went for a long weekend the end of January. The first one is Southbeach. The great thing about going to the beach there is that no matter what you do or wear, you will still not be the oddest person people saw that day.

Just a few reminders of the fact that teh sun is, in fact, just beyond the clouds. Still keeping it in perspective.

Psalm 103

A friend of mine, Hettie, and I have been memorizing scripture together. Each week we add another 3 verses to what we have already stored away in our gray matter, and then type it in an email and send it to the other. If we remain on schedule tomorrow we will complete Psalm 103. Before that we had been working on Ephesians 1. I love Ephesians, but if you look at the first chapter it's a lot of phrases that sound the same all repeated over and over. We were both struggling so we set it aside for a short time. I had been studying Psalm 103 on my own and when I told Hettie to choose a passage that's the one she chose. Hmmmm....maybe God had that worked out already?

Tomorrow is a big day for several people I know. I have a relative going to the doctor to learn biopsy results. A dear friend who was adopted into a loving family over 30 years ago is having a conference call with her biological father who only recently found out that she even exists. Another friend is having a second interview with a missions agency, which may lead to an indefinite placement somewhere in Africa. Finally a friend's mom is going for a PET scan to see if/how far her cancer has spread. You know what I have to do tomorrow? Go to work. It's even only expected to be about a 1/2 day. This evening all of these people that I love have been on my mind a lot. I'm not worrying, just thinking. As I said in my last entry, sometimes you want the words to say and they just aren't there. As I've been thinking about it, though, there are promises in Psalm 103 to cover nearly every step in life's journey. He promises that His love is always with those who fear Him. He heals all of our diseses. As Heather wrote in her blog, sometimes that can be done in a variety of ways, but He does promise it. I don't need to come up with the words for any of these people, I've already been memorizing them!

I've come to the conclusion that it's not an accident that it looks like I'll have a short day at work tomorrow. We can pray as we go about our day, but it's also nice to be able to set aside dedicated time for it as well. One of the best places I've found to pray is the pool at the Y. As I swim from wall to wall looking at the tiles on the floor of the pool, all I have to do is pray or sing in my head or think. I think I'll go in the afternoon so I don't have to get up at 0500. When I go in the afternoon, it's usually an extended workout. Perfect! Good exercise and great prayer time. Won't you help me if you happen to think about each of my dear ones throughout the day?

The gift of surgery doesn't always feel like a gift

This is a long one, so come back later if you only have a couple minutes. Sorry-O! (In West Africa, we add O to the end of many words.) I'll get around to explaining my title, but first I thought I'd take time to share a few more pictures. Take time.......that's a very African thing to say. We use it slightly differently. There if you're walking down the street too fast, eating too fast, talking too fast, basically going through life too fast, a West African will tell you to "take time". Translated to American english, it means "slow down". Take time to smell the roses. Anyway...there may be a few random thoughts thrown in this one. You just never know.

This first picture is of one of the wards on the Africa Mercy. Private rooms? Private toilets? Think again! We are used to so much pampering here. There were 4 wards. Two of them have 20 beds. This is half of one of the wards. There's a wall separating the two sides, 10 beds on each side. There's one toilet for every 10 beds. Actually this particular ward has 15 beds and only ONE toilet. Remember that most Liberians aren't accustomed to using toilets so even though there's one there to be used, you may not want to. I'll get around to more of that in a bit.

This is the other half of the 15 bed ward, Peace Ward. That's a funny name considering it was typically the pediatric ward, so there was often not a lot of Peace.
Below is an example of the pictures that hang in every patient bathroom. Like I said, many Liberians don't have the benefit of using toilets. They squat where they have opportunity to relieve themselves. I'll explain that again in another post when I share more pictures of the city. Use your imagination until then. Anyway...these are examples of things not to do and ways to use it. Just because you usually squat, do not stand on this bowl and squat......good way to fall in. No, the nice white bowl of clean looking water is not for laundry. The final two are pretty self-explanatory. Finally, remember to push the button on the wall to empty the bowl when your finished. When I first saw these pix I was very amused until I worked my first shift. I was trying to think of new pictures to add for issues these didn't cover. What an education!!!! My first shift the ladies forgot about pushing the button and we nearly had a flood. Needless to say, with a less-than-perfect plumbing system to begin with, the poor plumbers were called more times than I care to admit.
This is Dr. Steve Arrowsmith, a urologist from the American Southwest, New Mexico, I believe. He's affectionately known on the AFM as Dr. Steve. The world does not have very many VVF surgeons, because VVF is not an issue in the developed world. Here is a brief explanation of VVF. One day if I see him again, I'll have to ask how he came to do what he does. He spent at least 12 weeks of 2007 in Africa doing surgery for free. In this picture he is sporting a hat made by one of his grateful patients. This man is a teddy bear in the purest sense of the phrase. He cares so much about each of his patients. He rejoices when they do well, and takes it extremely hard when they do not. I could share much more about Dr. Steve, but that will have to suffice for now.
That brings me to the final picture of this post. This is Fatmata. Her friends call her Fata (sounds like gotta, not fat). I was privileged to be one of thse friends. Patients are typically admitted the night before their surgery and have their pre-op. That's pretty much the same as surgery here at home-an IV, a bowel prep, etc. I admitted Fata and went through the routine. There is always a mixture of excitement, apprehension, and fear of the unknown. I have to say it would be very intimidating. For most, this is the first time they've been on a ship, been in a hospital, or had surgery. Add to that the fact that yes, most Liberians speak English, but their English and ours is not the same. It would be a scary experience. There's also the desperate hope that this leaking will stop. In Fata's case, this was not her first attempt at a VVF repair. I'm still not sure, but I believe this was actually her third. It would be hard to allow yourself to hope.

I was still getting used to the fact that it's completely acceptable to ask your patients if they want you to pray with them, but just before she settled in for the night, I asked just that. We sat together on the edge of her bed and I prayed. I had to wonder how much she understood, but I was grateful for the fact that God is big enough to hear us in any language. She thanked me. I gave her a big hug, and tucked her in for the night. I knew that night that Fata was going to be someone that would stick with me for life. I was struck first by her beauty. She has gorgeous milky skin, strong cheekbones, and eyes that speak volumes. They say a picture is worth a thousand words. There is a book in her eyes. We are close to the same age. I sensed that in a different time and place we may have been very good friends.

The next day Fata went off to surgery. One of my roommates was an OR nurse, so we often ate lunch together and talked about how our days were going. She talked that day about a very difficult case that did not go well. There was not enough tissue to perform a repair. It happens more aften than we would like that there is too much damage, but Shonagh said that this was one that Dr. Steve was taking very hard. It was not good news to hear, but it still didn't hit me until that evening when I went to work I learned that the difficult case was Fata. At the beginning of evening shift Fata was still pretty sedated from the anesthesia. I'm ashamed to admit that I was relieved to not be assigned to her because I was so sad for her that I just didn't know what to say or do, so I was glad to not have to interact. I remember later talking with Jo, another one of the nurses, and she said that when she broke the news to Fata she sat down on the bed next to her and just cried. She said that she has not cried many times while she's been on the ship, and she had been there for a year or so. As she described it, she just said that Fata's story broke her heart the tears came before she realized what she was doing.

Many times if the surgery was not successful the patients would recover for a couple days and then go home, still leaking. In Fata's case, she had an RVF, which is a rectal fistula as well as the vaginal, so she was also leaking stool. That was able to be repaired so she remained for about 2 weeks as she recovered. I'm ashamed, once again, to say that it was not without relief on my part that during those two weeks I was gladto not be assigned to her again. That's not to say that my heart didn't break every time I was in the room with her. She was so sad. It goes so far beyond a bad day. She barely spoke in those two weeks. Her bed was beside a wall, and she faced that wall all the time. As I learned more of her story through other nurses, I learned that she had been on the Anastasis the last time Mercy Ships was there. I believe she had also been done earlier in the year as well. That made this her third try. During that two weeks I found it hard to even look at Fata because my heart broke for her and I just didn't know what to say or do to make it better. Remember that VVF patients are treated like the lepers in the Bible. It felt like we had failed her and were sending her home to the wolves.

Toward the end of Fata's recovery period I knew that I had to spend some time with her. It was eating me up inside that just because I didn't have the words to say or anything to fix the problem, I was doing nothing to provide this dear woman with even a modicum of comfort. Through Clemetine, our ward chaplain, I learned that Fata was having thoughts of ending her life due to her deep disappointment. Clementine had also said that Fata was not a Christian. I prayed first and then went to the ward. It was uncomfortable. I was not working. I was just there to visit. After a couple minutes I sat on the edge of Fata's bed and made a bit of small talk. Due to the difficulty of speaking, small talk was no small feat. I quickly got down to business. Still not sure how to go about it, I simply told Fata that I knew that she must be feeling very sad and disappointed. I told her how sorry I was that her surgery was not more successful, and that she would be in my prayers. I got about as far as "I'm sorry" and she began crying silent tears. It was then that I realized that words were not what was necessary, just presence and love. I wrapped my arms around her and we just both cried for a bit. Shortly afterward, we went out into the hall to have a little more privacy. Sometimes those 20 bed wards can make private discussions difficult. She shared more of her story with me. She lives with her uncle who doesn't want her and is not nice to her. I got the impression that he's abusive, but I was having some difficulty understanding her. She said that her mother died in the war, she has no sister, and no aunties to help her. I asked if she goes to church and has any friends there, but she said that she's isn't able to go because of the leaking. She has no living children. I asked her if she knows Jesus. She shook her head and seemed to not be willing to broach that topic. She told me she was going home the next day. I promised to visit before she left. I then went to my cabin, lay on my bed, and cried harder than I have in a very long time.

I wasn't in my cabin long when the phone rang. It was one of the nurses in the ward, saying that Fata was asking for me. It had been decided that she was going to home a day earlier than expected. I walked down the hall. (I lived only about 50 steps from where I worked.) This time Fata and I found an empty room and talked. There were many more tears. We spoke more about Christ. She told me that she knew and trusted Him. I still had my doubts, considering what. I already knew, but I had to go on what she told me. Clementine and Esther, a translator and assitant to Clementine, came to drive Fata home. Usually the patients went by cab, but Clementine had been keeping close tabs on Fata for the last 2 years. Obviously Fata is dear to her as well. The four of us spoke a bit and then they drove her home. The picture above was taken just before Fata walked up the steps to the gangway. It's interesting to me that she's the one suffering and I'm the one with the bloodshot eyes. I promised her that day that whether or not we ever meet again here on earth, she will be in my prayers for the rest of my life. I've kept that promise. Barring a miracle, the leaking will be for the rest of her life. I wonder about her so often. Has that miracle occurred? Does she know Christ? Is she still leaking? Is her family caring for her? Is she getting enough to eat? Is she sleeping on the ground? Does she feel safe? Does she have even one friend? Does she feel Christ wrapping His arms around her? Clementine said that only the Holy Spirit could say the words to truly change Fata's heart. In the meantime, she said "I'm going to keep checking on the is one". When I first learned that the AFM was returning to Liberia, rather than Sierra Leone as originally planned, the first thing I thought of was that there could be continued follow up with Fata. The fact that I don't get to go visit Fata is the source of some of my deepest disappointment in not being able to return to Liberia. I've tried, without success thus far, to get in touch with Clementine by email. I'm going to keep trying. Until then, maybe longer, I will keep praying. Every time I pray with the desperate hope that if not on this earth, that Fata and I will be able to spend eternity together, worshipping with all of the might we have in our bodies that don't suffer with earthly hurts.

The Africa Mercy in all her glory

Here are a few pics of the Africa Mercy.
This a view of the ship from the end of the dock.
The laundry. Pretty self-explanatory. Remember, though, that because of water restrictions we only got to do one load a week. It's hot and muddy in Liberia, which means your clothes get pretty dirty every time you walk off the gangway. That load also includes scrubs for work and any clothes you wear to work out. Thank goodness for Febreeze!

Mmmmmmmmm....Starbucks. It's closed in this pic, but still provides plenty of tables to hang out. There was always black coffee available in the dining hall 24 hr. a day. Another small thing to be grateful for.

The internet cafe. There was also wireless available in the midships lounge and the dining hall.
A portion of the midships lounge. This is sort of the family room of the ship. We used it for watching movies on laptops, emailing, reading, devotions, playing games, Bible studies and just hanging out.

This is the Africa Mercy on the right and the Anastasis on the left. The Ana sailed away about two weeks after I arrived. She was sailed to India and sold as scrap after many years of service. She was originally a beautiful cruise liner and then when she was old and worn out, she was rehabed to become a hospital ship for many more years. The ship has nearly 25 Land Rovers as well to navigate the roads and country side. I'll add some pics of the road another day. I'm proud to say that this picture was taken by a fellow crew member from Michigan.

The last 2 pictures are the berth I shared with Kassi, from Canada. I was on the bottom. Take not of the fact that this was all of the space the two of us could call our own. Really the only place each crew member could consider their own space was their bunk. Even then, mine was Kassi's stepstool to hers. Also note the fact that it's so small that I was standing against the far wall of the hallway in our cabin and still had to take 2 pics to get the whole space in b/c it was too small to get a full view in one shot. We each had one side of the closet.

Long Overdue!

After many requests, I'm finally getting around to an update. This post has been a long time coming. I had originally started this site because I figured it would be an easy way to share my experience in Liberia with those still at home. Well, now I'm home, and still occasionally get requests for updates. I've procrastinated, mostly because I figured if I'm not in Liberia any more, I don't have that much to say. That may be true, but I suppose I can find something to talk about. Life still goes on, it's just changed in many ways.



Seven months ago I thought that by this point, I would have already been back on the Africa Mercy, looking toward at least a year of service there. It's a Sunday evening, and I'm sitting in Fort Wayne, Indiana. So here you go Nicole.........



I really don't know what the plan is from here. As I said, the plan was to go back to Liberia. I read a sign recently that said, "Want to make God laugh? Tell Him your plans!" Apparently, He's having a laugh. I don't think it's a spiteful laugh or a cruel laugh, it's an "I want you to hold onto Me, and nothing else" laugh. I don't know if/when I'll be returning to service with Mercy Ships due to some health issues. It's nothing life-threatening, but I'm not sure that I will be able to return, at least for now. It's taken a while to be OK with that and really trust God on this one. You could probably tell from my previous posts that I loved being in Liberia and what I was doing there. He's faithful, though, and it's time to readjust and go from here.



For now, I'm still working at Surgery ONE and living life. I've been out of town a LOT in the last 2 months, at least on the weekends. I was at Central, where I go to church, this morning for the first time in 3 or 4 weeks. It was nice to reconnect, even though nearly half of the congregation seemed to be in the Sunshine State today. Hmmmmm....just a bit jealous. I did spend a long weekend in the Miami area 2 months ago, though, so I certainly can't complain.



As I was telling Nicole, I feel like I don't really have much exciting to say lately. I just realized, though, that now that I have a faster internet connection, I could share some of the pictures from my time in Liberia. As I think back, there are so many patients that I fell in love with and would love to share. So many of you that read this can enjoy it as well, knowing that your prayers and support helped make it all possible. I'll try to do a few pics and a new patient's story each week for a while.

I also wanted to get word out that there is going to be a show on PBS in May titled "A Walk to Beautiful". I saw a portion of it while I was on the AFM. My primary assignment was caring for VVF patients. You can check out some of my earlier entries to understand a bit more about VVF if you're not familiar. The movie is about a fistula hospital in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. The documentary is very well done, and does a wonderful job of explaining the shame and suffering that the women go through. As of now, it's scheduled to air on May 13, 2008 at 8pm. I definitely recommend it!

Faith

Last Sunday in church Pastor Don and Troy used the sermon title "What's in Your Barn?" It was a fitting sermon after the last three months. I can say that I have seen first hand how truly wealthy we are here in America . I can also say that I'm not sure that we're happier or more fulfilled. In fact, I think I've seen that the more we have the more we want and the less content we are. I don't know how to say it more concisely than that. Monrovia is the capital city of Liberia . Still, 3 years after the war, there is no public water, electricity, sewage, or acceptable roadways. The capital city! We get so upset if we go without electricity for 12 hours and they've gone years without it. Still I found so many people there who are wholeheartedly assured that the only course of action is to trust God. Many of them know that He is the only answer, they're just still waiting to see the practical responses to their prayers.

This is always interesting to me. Where do you think their deep trust in God comes from? How do you think they are so patient in their faith? -- is it cultural? different religious practices? And are there tangible ways that you see Monrovians faith where it is absent by Americans? I’d love to hear your answers if you are able to write about it. I think these are important questions to think about/discuss/implement.

The first paragraph above is part of a newsletter that I wrote after returning from Liberia. The paragraph in red is a repsonse from a college friend. The remainder of this entry will be my attempt at a response.

In the Western world or developed nations, we have so much. Even the poor have so much more than what is needed in many cases. There are those struggling to make it from day to day, don't get me wrong, but the vast majority in the U.S. have food, shelter, clothing, utilities, and we're all entitled to a free education. In fact, if we qualify, we even get free or very inexpensive health care. Not only do most of us have the majority of our needs met, we have abundance that is not even able to be comprehended by many in the world. I don't know all the statistics, but in the sermon I mentioned, one of our pastors gave several statistics regarding wealth. I think he said something to the effect that if you own a book you're among the world's wealthiest 5%. (Forget owning that book. Being able to read it is wealth we don't understand. So many of my patients just laughed at me when I asked if they had any education.) There were several other examples that he used. I'm sure they're available online. The details aren't my point. The point is, most of us have some sort of education and therefore, earning power. Many of us also receive some sort of wealth from our families such as free educations, inheritance, assistance over the years, etc. Even if we don't have much, most of us have the means to obtain life's basic needs. There are many social work agencies available to provide assistance for most of those that look for it. Sadly, we find it easy to rely on our possessions or means of obtaining those possessions. If we're sick we go to the doctor. If we're hungry we go to the grocery. If we want something new to wear, we go to the mall. If we want a bigger house, we take out a bigger loan.

For much of the world, our reality is an unheard of phenomenon. As I observed in Liberia this summer, there just aren't means for all in the world to obtain the basic needs of life as easily as it is here in the West. Like the first paragraph noted, there is not public water, electricity, sewage, or even acceptable roadways. If simple things like disposing of trash, sewage, and providing clean water are not a possibility or a reality, then other social programs are obviously far on the back burner, years in the future as the rebuilding process continues. When you hit rock bottom and have nowhere else to turn, what do you do? For centuries, the world has sought some sort of "higher power". There are many "higher powers" to be tapped into. This summer I became much more aware of the fact that Africa is a very spiritual continent, much moreso than most Western countries. Romans 8:9 says, "if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ". So there are millions in Africa who either don't know Christ or have chosen not to follow Him. That means that they are worshipping, trusting, and being controlled by many spirits that are of Satan. It's a matter of, if not one, then the other. So...many turn to evil spirits, but there are also many who have learned of the blessings afforded by the Holy Spirit.

It's easy for us to assume that blessings refer to material possessions, but that's not even the beginning of it. There are the blessings of salvation, faith, healing, hope, family, beauty in nature, felloship with other believers, the Word, and so many others. As we begin to realize and appreciate them, we begin to find joy and peace in the midst of tragedy and suffering. Those, especially in Africa, who have learned to rely on the Holy Spirit, rather than evil spirits realize that they have a hope that cannot be taken away by poverty, death, hunger, pain, or any earthly power. The Holy Spirit affords a power we can't imagine if we only allow Him. I think that's where their patience comes from. I think that's where their faith is rooted. Most, in Liberia, at least, have no other choice. They can't go to a shelter or social work agency to obtain the help they need, in most cases. They have tried the worship of other powers that are not of God and they don't help, don't help for long, or bring harm. Any other "faith system" or "higher power" they might deal with worships a being that is dead. That's not the case for Christians. For those in Liberia who know Christ, knowing that He is alive and has not forgotten them is everything.

I have to say a bit of the patience is also cultural. Life moves at a much slower pace in much of the world. I have heard so many go on short-term missions trips and come home referring to Mexican time, Indian time, African time, etc. People frequently have to wait in long lines for any sort of service or event. It's not a big deal to them most of the time. If you apply for some sort of government service, it takes much longer than would be acceptable to us. That's usually dealt with patiently. If you come for a free surgery and have to sleep outside the night before and then wait until 6pm the next day to be seen by the doctor, it's still looked at as a privilege to have been cared for at all. So...if God doesn't answer your prayer as quickly as you would like or in exactly the same way that you like, you're ready to keep waiting.

I may have written about this in one of my letters, but it's worth sharing again. At one end of the ward in the hospital there was a map of the world with pictures of the long-term staff. Many times I walked by that map and patients would be there looking at it. There was more than once that I'm sure I was showing a patient a map of their country for the first time! Their eyes grew huge with amazement as the began to see how Liberia compared with the size off the entire world. One of my favorite things about my time on the ship was when a patient would look at the map, see where Liberia is, see how many other countries the staff had come from and then just look at me with tears in their eyes. "You mean you're not all from America?" I'd assure them that no, we had come from more than 30 countries. "God brought all of the necessary people here at the same time from many places to help Liberia, to help me?" Yes, with a smile, I would agree that God had quite a schedule to juggle. "OH! My God! He heard me! He knew I was suffering! I knew that it was good that He healed me, but I didn't know He did all this just for me!" More than once all I could do was stand there with tears in my eyes as they laughed or cried with joy. What a privilege it was to be God's hands and feet, to get to be the tangible resource to remind someone that, no, God has not forgotten you!

You know that when God speaks to one person suffering like that and He hears and answers that cry, that person is not going to be quiet! One of my patients told me that she was going to go home to tell all the Muslims in her village that they better wise up because their prophet is dead and her Jesus is still alive. I think that's what it all boils down to. When you believe that Christ is alive and loves you, how can you not find some strength in that, even when today looks hopeless?

1 Peter 5:10 says, "And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast."

Coming and Going

It's been a long time since I've been able to write here. First I was too busy at work to be able to blog, and then over the weekend the satellite was turned off. I'll put more about that at the end of this entry. Still no luck uploading pictures. Sorry. I guess I'll have a lot to show when I come home!

As is the way with life, there has been a lot of coming and going here on the ship over the last few weeks. We tend to only have any particular surgeon here for a few weeks at a time, so the types of surgeries we're doing changes frequently. We finished the first round of VVF surgeries. All of them went home. Many went home with successful repairs, but not all. Some will return in the fall for another attempt. It's humbling to see some of those with enough damage that they couldn't have a successful repair still going about the work of being an encouragement to each other. I'm pretty sure I would not be as strong. One who had a successful repair returned to the ship a couple days ago because of an infection. I think she'll be OK, but it's scary for her. I have to admit, that as you get to know the ladies you can't help but love them. I was sorry to see Quita have an infection, but it's nice to see her beautiful smile again for a while. We are also doing quite a bit of orthopedic surgery right now. The surgeons that were here the first few weeks of ortho are pediatric surgeons, so we've done a lot of kids. I like the kids, but I can't say that I enjoy taking care of them. I'm much more comfortable caring for adults. It's a growing experience!

We have also been doing a lot of eye surgeries. There's a fairly constant influx of outpatient procedures, like cataracts, but we've had more inpatient eye cases lately as well. Many come with all sorts of traumatic injuries to their eyes. Often (I put that word there for you, Marley:) the eye has been injured for so long that it's pretty grotesque to see. I can't imagine how uncomfortable it would be to have your eye swollen and knotty for more than 10 years let alone not being able to see. Many of those patients come hoping to have their sight restored. That's just not always an option. It's not fun to do pre-op teaching and have to make sure that the patient understands that after their surgery, not only will they not have full sight, we will be taking the eye out to prevent infection or other complications. It's a huge disappointment to them. It's somewhat the same with the dental clinic. There are some things that they can do to help people and preserve their teeth, but as a general rule, people come with teeth that have been in bad shape for a long time. A lot of what the dental team does is simple extractions. At home, just going without a few of your teeth would not be an acceptable option, but here it's better to lose your tooth than it is to have an infection that becomes systemic and kills you.

For the most part the last couple weeks had been pretty routine day to day stuff, work, hang out, watch movies, and go to Monrovia. Sunday changed the experience for many. One of our crew drowned at a local beach. The satellite was turned off until his family could be properly notified without it getting to them through the grapevine before someone was able to tell them in person. He was a 21 year old from Texas. Yesterday would have been his 22nd birthday. The rip currents here are incredibly strong and sadly on Sunday the sea won. It's not fun to be one of 400 people wandering around a ship not sure what to do with themselves. Three people that were at the beach with him have flown to Texas to attend his funeral. One of the three is my roommate. Another one of the three got the news that her grandpa had passed away the next day. Please keep them and his family in your prayers. It has hit all of us quite hard, even though many of us didn't know him very well. I can't imagine the shock, for his family, of receiving that news at home.

So...as I said, many comings and goings. I certainly never expected the kind of going that we had on Sunday. I knew before I came that this is a place that you're always meeting new people and saying goodbye to friends who have finished their term. I guess I didn't think much about how much it would also be difficult to say goodbye to the patients after getting to know them. It's fun, though, to get to know the new group of patients coming in. We have a file on the computer that the communications department is constantly updating with pictures of the different outreaches on the ship. It's quite impressive to look back at them. Since I've worked mostly with the VVF ladies, they are the ones that stand out to me the most. It's an encouragement to look at the pictures of them when they first arrive for screening and then see pictures or remember their faces when they go home. When you look back at the fear and sadness in their eyes when they arrived and see then see joyful pictures of them as they depart or remember their bubbly personalities that came out as they were here, you can't help but feel blessed with the privilege of getting to see that process. One encouraging thought is that you never know who's going to walk up the gangway tomorrow. You have to say goodbye a lot, but a dear friend may be walking up the gangway tomorrow if you're willing to take the time to get to know them. There is risk involved because you know that they or you will be leaving sometime in the probably not so distant future, but so often the reward is worth the risk!